On Tuesday the Associated Press ran a story they cribbed from the British magazine NME about Keith Richards. The story claimed that Richards, during a particularly debauched drug-binge, mixed up the ashes of his dead father with some cocaine and snorted his dad. They quoted Richards as saying, “‘He was cremated and I couldn’t resist grinding him up with a little bit of blow. My dad wouldn’t have cared…It went down pretty well, and I’m still alive.'”
What an awesome story, but sadly for us, it turns out it’s fake. Richards’ manager released a statement that asserted he made the comment in jest. Or maybe he was high. Who knows? We’re talking about Keith Richards here, so anything is possible.
I like the story though, so I’m going to continue to believe that Keith Richards snorted a mixture of cocaine and dead-guy. Feel free to believe the same thing.
I don’t have an ending for this, but initially that story reminded me of an episode of “Night Court.” Two sisters appeared before Harry that were seeking rights to their father’s ashes. Harry took the ashes of their father, who was named Herb, from them, and told them that when they could come to an agreement on their own they could have their father back. While the sisters were working out their problems, the janitor went into Harry’s chambers and replaced the coffee pot, and he thoughtfully refilled the pot with the “Herb” tea that was sitting in an urn on Harry’s desk. The next thing we see is Dan drinking coffee.
Damn “Night Court” was a good show. And just for good measure, here’s a video of Keith hitting a guy in the head with his guitar during a performance of “Satisfaction.”