Assault

I like to think of myself as an intelligent person. I read a lot. I pride myself on being politically and socially conscious. I use big words, and over fifty percent of the time I know what they mean.

But sometimes I do something so damn dumb that I wonder if evolution is trying to tell me something.

Tonight while I was showering I punched myself in the face. Accidentally. And it hurt.

Here’s what went down when I was attacked: I picked up the shampoo and squirted a dime-sized dollop in my right hand. As I lifted my hand towards my head to lather up, my elbow brushed the tile on the side of the shower. Instead of simply side-stepping to the left to move away from the wall, and thus remove the bind I was in, I thrust my hand up quickly. But unfortunately, the wall was wet, and when I thrust my hand up my elbow accelerated on the slippery surface, and my closed fist slammed into my jaw. And to add insult to injury, my fist flew open and I got shampoo in my eyes.

I almost fell down.

Sadly, this was not the most embarrassing thing I’ve ever done, nor is it the dumbest thing I’ve ever blogged about.

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